I used to pretend that mean just meant average, you know, a statistical joke that amused me. I'm mean..heh, heh, so average. But, I have this fantasy where I'm just so mean, no, not in that way, settle down there. I'm just MEAN!
Like you meet me for the first time and I'm not just like "whatever", I blank stare you into oblivion until even you doubt your own delusion. Just a brush off, the average sort. Or, I duck and disappear, a chance gone forever, but who cares. More fun remembering.
Being mean can be fun, you see? I'd like to see the heartbreak I'd cause, just not caring, at all. To make up, I suppose, in some sadly obvious way for all the heartbreak that's caused by just the day to day. You know.
The little things, like missing out, or imagining, and the rest.
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